User blog comment:GreekTelepath/Poisoned Flowers - A Fanmade Song/@comment-146.113.65.171-20150407172221

It's nice, and I like the perspective you took on it, but I'm not sure what the overall theme you're going for is. Onigashima was about Kayo's lasting effect on the memory of the town, SoE was about Allen's devotion, Portrait was about Gumina reflecting on her relationship with Cherubim, etc. Even Drug of Gold, which was the most like a summary out of all of them, had a theme of Carlos' spinelessness and cowardice. Your song just feels like a sequence of events. Is it about Mayrana's devotion to Julia? Is it her relationship with the doll? Is it her take on the story? I feel it could benefit from a narrower focus (for example, if it's about Mayrana's devotion to Julia, we don't need to know every detail of Kaspar and Margarita's marriage, nor do we need to know her opinion on Margarita. On the other hand, if it's about Mayrana's opinion on Margarita, we don't need to know how she met Julia, or about Pere Noel, or that she was defeated by two mages).

Right now it honestly feels like a recap.

I'm also not sure Mayrana would have such sympathetic views (towards Margarita mostly) as you describe in your lyrics, considering how deranged and cruel she was, particularly by the end.